Daisy Suzanne Allen
Born Sunday 6th March 2011
Daisy's choice phrases
Her life: Birth ♥ Week 1 ♥ Weeks 2-3 ♥ Weeks 4-7 ♥ Weeks 8-13 ♥ Weeks 14-22 ♥ 5-7 months ♥ 7-8 months ♥ 8-10 months ♥ 1st Christmas ♥ 10-12 months ♥ 1st birthday party ♥ 12-15 months ♥ 15-18 months ♥ 18-21 months ♥ 21-24 months ♥ 2nd birthday ♥ 2-2½ years ♥ 2½-3 years ♥ 3rd birthday ♥ 3-3¼ years ♥ 3¼-3½ years ♥ 3½-3¾ years ♥ 3¾-4 years ♥ 4th birthday
In summary: Index ♥ From birth to four years old ♥ Four years old onwards
Special features: Daisy translator ♥ Daisy cookery ♥ Daisy phrases ♥ Golden Bear
As Daisy's grasp of English improved immeasurably during her third year (and into her fourth), our amusement at some of the choice phrases she came out with increased. The comedy comments are too numerous to mention, or indeed fully recall, but I did manage to capture some by noting them down on my phone before I forgot them.
December 2013
"They must be somewhere. Mummy, where are my badgers? Have you tidied them away?" - I think she had some small badgers from her advent calendar.
January 2014
"I get a tissue and wipe the tears" - said in response to me talking about the likelihood of her baby brother crying (once out).
"You just make good lunches, Daddy" - you can read this a number of ways, but I knew what she meant. Sort of.
February 2014
"I'm too good at this" - talking about a Spot The Difference game with wipe-clean cards and a black felt tip.
"This isn't something we do" - directed at either Lynne or me; where did she get this from?
"I want to be a doctor when I grow up" - apropos of nothing whilst at the swimming baths, although she later said that being a piggy was an aim, rather undermining her more ambitious target.
"Daddy, why you home from work so late?" - asked with a puzzled look as I got home at around 2.40pm (to provide a fairly heavily pregnant Lynne some support), clearly a little confused at the difference between 'early' and 'late'.
April 2014
"Is he in Scotland?" - said in response to a short chat about my dad, whom I elliptically referred to as being 'not with us any more' as Daisy questioned me with a nagging curiosity.
"And our juice makes wee wee and our food makes poo" - delightfully uttered at the dinner table.
"No, my baby has already hatched" - a slightly confused response to Louise asking 'How are you being a big sister?', although partly explained by it being Easter weekend.
"I'm going to wear these when I'm superbig" - referring, rather optimistically, to my trainers (not least because they will be unlikely to last that long).
"Is it in the courtyard?" - when seeking the gents at the Stockport cinema as we headed down a corridor with an empty car park visible through the window at the end, making the prospect seemingly a possibility.
"They're flying again" - when watching The Snowman. Seconds later, when Aled Jones sang 'we're walking in the air', Daisy immediately replied: "No, flying not walking".
"Nice pie, Daddy. You're the best pie to make ever" - I think I'd made a chicken, bacon and leek pie to prompt this (and no, I've not misspelt the quote).
"Daddy, you're 'piky. You having a smooth tomorrow?... Shave!" - Daisy confusing smooth with shave there, but realising it just in time.
May 2014
"Daddy, come on , I can't stay here for ever" - which I think was prompted by her being in the car seat since when I lifted her out she said "What are you waiting for?".
"Have a great day!" - when saying goodbye as Lynne took her to nursery.
"He likes me, he likes me so much" - referring to Gregory as he had a bath in the sink.
June 2014
"Daddy, can you have a shave tomorrow?" - having mastered the phrase (see above), she could now ask on a particular morning for a shave the next day if I was too spiky on kissing goodbye for work.
"It's raining, it's pouring; everyone is boring" - Daisy invented new lyrics to the rhyme while pouring water over Gregory's head as he sat in the "tummy tub" (or the bucket bath, or whatever you want to call it).
"Don't talk, darnce" - said in response to my talking over the closing music to the animated film Frozen. I've tried, in the way I've written it, to reflect the way that she says "dance", i.e. like she's a posh southerner or something.
"You're better than other daddies" - reason not forthcoming.
"Aunty Janet. I've missed you. I hope you come round to my house. Not today." - AJ wasn't actually here at this point; I think Daisy was pretending to be on the phone.
"No, because he's got nipples" - a bizarre response to my question of "Gregory can't have raisins, can he?"
"Isn't he being patient waiting for his milk" - uttered about Gregory (obviously) a couple of times; it was something she has mentioned a few times since then (or variants thereof).
August 2014
"I was scared last night mummy," said Daisy - "Yeah, she came in at 2," I replied - "That's not very much is it," Daisy partly asked, partly assured Lynne. I noted that bigger numbers are better when it comes to waking me up."
"Thanks Daddy, I love ten minutes" - response to me saying that she could have another ten minutes in the indoor play area at Marple garden centre (because I was feeding Gregory). We normally have a negotiation with me starting at two minutes and her at ten minutes, so immediately offering ten minutes led her to be very grateful.
"Daddy, do you have a willy?" - the inevitable question to which I replied in the affirmative (it was prompted by Gregory being dressed after a bath).
"Phones are really exciting so I'm going to play on my phone" - her phone being my old iPod touch, commandeered by Daisy and no longer really mine.
September 2014
"Mummy, let's play crown snatching" - whilst in a castle somewhere near Aberfeldy.
"Mummy, Gregory is splashing with his robo arm" - something Gregory does in his bucket bath (aka tummy tub), often soaking completely the bathroom floor (not to mention his face).
October 2014
"How old are you?" - "I'm 3" - "When are you 4?" - "I'll be 4 for my birthday" says Daisy, helpfully precise and literal as ever in conversation with her swimming instructor.
"I only want to watch it when I want to watch it" - a tautological utterance from Daisy, but I did understand the point she was making at the time, referring to the DVD borrowed from the library.
"Don't go in this one, it doesn't say your name on here" - said to Lynne as she went to make the bed in Daisy's room.
"That makes it feel better already" - in response to me giving her finger a quick kiss (she had fallen at school was at this point commonplace).
"Your birthday isn't for a few months" - "No it's not, it's tomorrow" - "No, tomorrow is Friday" - "What day is my birthday on?" - "I don't know because it's so far away." - "So is my birthday on the motorway?" - a disarming confusion of time and distance in a conversation between Daisy and me.
"Cheese on the up [or perhaps top], bread on the down" - Daisy's simple description of cheese on toast.
"I want tuna but I don't want tuna all the days 'cos it's not good for my teeth and I want my teeth to be nice and healthy" - Daisy had evidently covered teeth and their health at school, as she wanted to know whether various foodstuffs were good for her teeth or not. I'm not sure why she thought tuna was bad for her teeth.
"Don't say you're bad at drawing mummy, it will make your heart horrible"
November 2014
"It's got a big ball shaped like a lemon" - when asked about rugby. Her knowledge surprised us.
"Gregory moaner and poo Gregory. That's what they're going to call you. Poo Gregory Allen. Poo sick Gregory Allen." - a neat summary of the things that Gregory most commonly does.
She kept referring to 'Santa Christmas'. After reminding her it was Father Christmas, I asked her "do you know what father means?", to which she replied "Yes". I then asked "what does it mean?". "It's what a father is" - that was me told.
December 2014
"I think that tuna yesterday has made me even more clever" - in response to correctly assessing which was her left leg and which was her right; plus at a recent 'stay and play' session at the school nursery, Lynne found out that Daisy was near the top of her class for literacy and almost as good at numeracy. We must have mentioned it to her!
"Gregory, don't do sick on my hand when I'm going to school"
In response to me talking about Team Daddy while Lynne was away in Munich: "You are going to look after me" - "I am. Are you going to be a good girl?" - "Yes, because I love you"
And a little later in the morning: "This is the best day ever. I've never had a day like this. Mummy is the best mummy ever" - all for an extra advent calendar present of a special pad with pens.
"It wasn't my fault was it 'cos I wasn't in that programme" - in response to a broken window in children's TV shows.
"You are the wickedest cushion in the world 'cos you fell down... I'm just kidding". Then later: "I'm watching you, cushion".
"I don't like winters, I want to get all the winters and put them in the bin. I want to get the summers and put them in our house." - on New Year's Day. It was probably cold and wet.
On the comparison between (nursery) school and home, to her teacher: "I like school better than home because I have too many toys at home".
February 2015
"Trumping is when it's saying something. That's what's important about bottoms." - no, me neither.
"I love you a little bit Daddy; I love you a lot Mummy because... [reason]." - I have no record of the reason (perhaps I couldn't hear because of my own tears).
"I'm right about everything, you know" - in response to me pretending I was a baby daddy ("no, you're a grown-up").
"Mummy, you put the wrong one [DVD] on, you're such a silly billy. But sometimes you're just a mother." - interesting use of the word "just".
"I need some food otherwise I won't have any energy." - uttered at 6am.
"I'm listening to you today, Mummy."
March 2015
"Big massive mega raisin" - when they stick together.
"How about if you're called Lynne Allen. There are three people in this family called Allen but you're called Schofield" - said when in the not knowing when to keep quiet phase...
April 2015
"Sometimes when you go on an adventure with someone with the same name you go on a Paul adventure" - never a truer word spoken as I jetted off to Amsterdam to rendezvous with Paul Brunger.
"A hot cross bun sounds nice, Daddy, but I don't think I want one."
May 2015
"Why do people die?" - good luck with that one, Lynne.
June 2015
"My favourite part of the day was that" - in response to eating a couple of marshmallows from the top of Lynne's hot chocolate. We'd spent 20-odd quid going round a wildlife oasis but the marshmallows trumped it...
"I think he was saying 'who's that girl?'; it's Daiz, your best friend" - possibly trying to interpret some of Gregory's gibberish.
"I'd love some raisins if you could do me that" - in response to my question "do you want any more breakfast?".
July 2015
"Little baby Geggy" - what she liked to call Gregory at that time.
"Definitely, if you want to" - in response to my request to watch the cricket. And later: "you can watch the cricket if you want to, Daddy". That's my girl.
"Mummy, I love you and Daddy so much that I want to cry" - she is sweet but does rather wear her emotions on her sleeve.
"Come on you two, you're missing that bongo" - I've no idea.
The end
And that's pretty much that. I stopped taking notes of her comments as her speech became more sophisticated. I'm sure there are many more moments captured on video, but it's time to close this chapter.
Back to the Secret Portal.